Usually we just live with diabetes. Meaning it just is. We live life around it and don't dwell on it more than necessary.
Once in a while, like today, I have a bad day and really battle the emotions of it.
It's been a rough couple of weeks with Benjamin's numbers, and I am feeling uncertain about my decisions with him right now.
I try not to talk about it very often. I don't ever want anyone to think I am complaining, or that caring for Benjamin isn't one of the greatest joys of my life.
But today. . . I feel like being a little bit raw with all of you and sharing some emotions.
You are never free from Type 1 Diabetes.
You have to deal with it day and night,
every couple of hours,
ALL DAY LONG,
365 days a year.
You do not get a vacation from it.
It does not go away. EVER!
There is no cure.
They will not "outgrow" it.
You try not to let it control your lives,
But really, there is no escaping it.
You learn.
You read about it and you talk to experts.
You adjust when you need to.
You have to adjust often.
You do what you have to do and then . . .
You get up and do it all again the next day.
You educate those who don't understand.
A lot of people don't understand.
You watch for highs.
You are afraid of lows.
You wonder if you are doing enough.
You wish it could be you and not them.
You pray for daily strength.
You pray that you don't make a critical mistake.
You pray for a cure.
You do not get a vacation from it.
It does not go away. EVER!
There is no cure.
They will not "outgrow" it.
You try not to let it control your lives,
But really, there is no escaping it.
You learn.
You read about it and you talk to experts.
You adjust when you need to.
You have to adjust often.
You do what you have to do and then . . .
You get up and do it all again the next day.
You educate those who don't understand.
A lot of people don't understand.
You watch for highs.
You are afraid of lows.
You wonder if you are doing enough.
You wish it could be you and not them.
You pray for daily strength.
You pray that you don't make a critical mistake.
You pray for a cure.
4 comments:
Thank you, Debbi. These are real thoughts and emotions. And you are walking with our real Lord and Shepherd. He will never leave you or forsake you - or Benjamin.
THANK you for sharing this with us too. We love when you share the fun and silliness and teaching and love for Daddy and music and, and , and. So we love when you share the realness of this too. Love, Dee
I can't tell you how many times I have commented about how much I respect the watchful, loving way you care for your family -- especially Benjamin! As you know well, some days and nights are longer and more difficult than others. I'm praying that you'll be encouraged and strengthened by the Lord!
Love you friend! God has given you a gift! May His glory continue to shine through you. Praying for you all!
Debbi, Thank you for the reminder to pray for you more! Keep looking "Up"!
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